Coda

In musical terms, alla coda means to go to the next coda sign, which is a passage that brings a musical piece or movement to an end. As we move through the final weeks of Rachel’s high school years, it feels like a crescendo toward the finish. She is finishing up her classes, finals are looming, three piano competitions are on the calendar, a final solo recital is being planned, and Butler University, which was just a blip on our radar last year, has become an almost daily part of our conversations. They have called, sent letters and handwritten postcards, and overall been very warm and helpful in the past few months. The Dean of Music even stopped by last week for an hour to answer questions. Yes, I understand that these days, a university is like a business in many ways, but I am impressed by how personal the whole process has been so far. I have a good feeling about Rachel’s future at Butler and she is very eager to start this next chapter.

It’s so hard to believe, really. Is this the same shy girl who wanted absolutely no part of children’s church as a 5-year-old? We tried once – Mick even stayed with her the whole time – but she didn’t like it at all. She sat very quietly with us in church, so we didn’t force it. And now, she is not only preparing to go to college, but she is looking forward to it!  Even four years ago, I would’ve said “no way.”

So, I make calls, write down dates, put pins on our “Graduation Open House” Pinterest board, look through old pictures and try to convince myself that somehow, I’m going to have this all wrapped up neatly in the next six weeks.

And now I see snapshots of her through the years, flying through my memory like a series of Polaroids and it’s hard to fathom we’re at this point in our lives with her. This process of breaking away … this launching of our first child … it is coming in degrees. So hard to believe, but it is coming. Exciting? Absolutely. And I promise I’ll be genuinely smiling through it all, in spite of the lump in my throat.